I was enjoying my bestie’s son’s birthday bash. Children were having a lot of fun. Lots of music, dance, amazing food & a brilliant 3D cake! I was super proud of her. One of the kids came over and very sweetly said “Thank You for the party Aunty, I need to leave”. And in a sweeter voice she added “So, where can I collect my return gift??”. I am standing there, totally stoked – a rush of billion emotions speeding that fleeting second.

However, what surprised me was that my friend didn’t flinch at this?!!?? She very sweetly handed over a beautifully packed gift with her name written on it. The kid took the gift and the next instant reaction was to size it up and guess what might be in there…

My friend looked at my flabbergasted reaction. She calmly said, “I don’t like it too.. Wait until you have kids, darling!”. (Well, this was before Ananya was born!)

 

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 The first reaction of the older generation when they witness something that they don’t approve of is, well, you guessed it.. ” In OUR TIMES…..we NEVER.. yada yada yada yada”..

And I did just that. My birthday parties were homely affairs with a cake from the local bakery, a new dress, musical chairs and home baked food.

I had to be good all year round, to be entitled for a birthday party. My return gift was a “THANK YOU” with a smile, and maybe an eclairs. And we sure had a blast!

Don’t get me wrong. I am totally for innovation & new ways of celebration. The traditions & the exuberance of celebrations might change. But values still remain rooted.

But hey….Wait until you have kids, darling!”

 

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Well, I don’t have data to prove this. However, I feel as affordability and exposure grew, there came interesting ways of expressing ‘Thank You’.

This trend seems to have gotten amplified by the human need to conform to social strata & it’s practices. The click of a button share has transformed this into a mega necessity.

It may have started with SAY THANK YOU WITH A GIFT. However, it has gotten skewed along a generation. Now it seems, there is NO THANK YOU.. WITHOUT GIFTS!

 

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This was a topic of debate in one of our All Girls Jam Out session. As soon as this topic was raised, all the moms unequivocally proclaimed their hatred towards this dreaded practice.

This conversation brought a certain weariness in their eyes – tired of finding the perfect return gift & the need to keep up appearances amongst mom circles.

The worst part is, it is not about your child anymore! The most bizarre reason for losing the battle to the return gift -“I HAVE TO DO this, else my kid will have problems with their friends or worse yet.. they will ‘UNFRIEND’ them.”

Whaatt??? Do you see a problem here? Or is it just me!! And of course, it ended with, “.. Wait until you have kids, darling!”.

 

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 I am not against the practice of giving return gift or gifts(in general). It’s a way of expressing love & gratitude, right? I do it too.

And it doesn’t matter how small or how exclusive or how luxurious the gift is. Nobody has the right to judge that!

However the point is, don’t do it because YOU HAVE TO.. Do it Because YOU WANT TO! 

 Let’s not unwittingly raise a generation who believe that materialism is the only expression of gratitude & that it’s their entitlement. Let’s not blame the kids for wanting gifts.  We parents have a responsibility to sensitize them!

And that friend or mom who Unfriends or thinks lesser of you because of this.. You and your kid never needed them!

 

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 More often than not, I don’t gift my friends on their birthdays or anniversaries. The inside secret is that I am terrible with dates. My friends actually call me and ask me to wish them. But they know I love them! (Fingers Crossed).

When I WANT to, I do gift them & spoil them silly.. sometimes even for no reason or occasion!

 Inspite of NO Gifts or Return Gifts,I am very grateful for amazing friendships for life..

“So yea darling. Now I have a Kid & a Blog.. And Gifts from Me Would Be Only if I WANT To”

Stay Scrumdiddlyumptiously Awesome!

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